Well... I clicked it.

I wonder what the most sensationalistic headline possible would be? Here is a contender from the BBC News on BBC.co.uk:

Man cuts off penis in restaurant

The only way this headline could be improved is if you replace "man" with "George Bush" or "The Queen" or something. However, the actual story is rather less impressive than the headline. I had visions of a man coolly laying out his man-meat on a table and removing it with a knife in a Yakuza-like ritual or show of bravado.

Instead:

The man then picked up a kitchen knife and slashed himself across the wrist and groin areas before running back into the restaurant, where he continued to stab himself.

It's clearly a very sad story and very distressing for witnesses and the man himself and the headline is entirely inappropriate... but a guaranteed click.